2. The Great Work Of Your Life - i (Purpose & Life meaning)

There comes a time in every adults life, after all the basic security needs (food, clothing, shelter etc.) have been met, you realise that you're restless and searching for something still.

Some would say its time to settle down, start a home, have kids... others would say, start a business, make money, climb the career ladder, get famous and so on. Well, it turns out that in most cases even after all that, the restless/unsatisfied feeling stays...that's just the way it is, and actually its not a bad thing because that restlessness is what keeps us striving and reaching towards new grounds to conquer, or heights to surpass.

The big question however is, how do I know what grounds I'm supposed to be conquering? or what I should channel my efforts towards that would give me the most benefit? how can I be sure that what I'm currently doing is not a waste of time, or that the opportunities that present themselves are right for me?

Mehhn... in my own case my default response was that I was just being ungrateful to God for his numerous blessings in my life, and that I should be contented with my lot and keep it moving, but no matter how many times I prayed and said lord I am grateful, I still felt the nagging thought at the back of my mind that I was missing something. So I started a long search around purpose, and meaning, and duty and peace etc. I found a lot of information, had some great conversations, made some sketchy outlines, I was still in the process when I found this book.

The Great work of your life...

" If you bring forth what is within you, it will save you. But if you do not bring forth what is within you, it will destroy you"

The quote above from the book is one of the 1st things that made my heart pound when I read it, and the question I asked myself was, what is within me that has the power to both save and destroy me?(ponder on that) fortunately that question was answered as the book progressed.

The author uses the Bhagavad Gita (An ancient Indian tale) as the back drop for the learning's of this book. The Bhagavad Gita tells a story of a warrior whose moral duty is to fight on the side of good, against evil. On this particular battle however, it turns out that he is to fight against loved ones, as he sees family members, friends, teachers & elders in the enemies camp. He falls to his knees in his chariot and refuses to fight, but his charioteer and companion (a wise and elderly man) seeing the young warrior in despair decides to counsel him and guide him out of the great dilemma, giving him insight beyond the physical to understand the nature of this fight, plus the negative implications if he failed to carry out his duty as a warrior. The lesson begins with this question from the warrior to the wise man "what should I do? what is the right thing for me to do?"

What should I do? what is the right thing for me to do? A question I bet everyone of us has asked at several points in our lives and will go on asking as time goes by, in our quest to understand and fulfill what we are called to do in this lifetime. These questions were answered in Four Pillars by the companion, who it turns out, happened to be God in disguise.

The 1st Pillar: Look to your Dharma

Dharma is a Sanskrit word of indian origin which can be interpreted to mean "true nature", "essential traits", "real self", "sacred duty", "moral code". In essence, it is those aspects of us that were mysteriously already present in us even from birth and have stayed with us through out our lives making us uniquely who we are. We are aware of these traits, but for some of us, never really name them or hone them. It is essential that we recognize these unique aspects of us, we name them, we embrace them and we sharpen them with regular use and deliberate practice in order to fulfill our calling/purpose in life. Our inability to do so will have us feeling unsatisfied, chasing after others who have found and are living their own purpose, or settling for a life that appears close to what we think should be our purpose. This book gives several real life examples of persons who were actually living their purpose but refused to embrace it because they felt it was not glamorous enough or prestigious enough in comparison to what seemed to apply around them, so they lived in denial and in constant longing of what others seemingly had. It also gives great examples of those who discovered their purpose and spent the rest of their lives perfecting it, with tremendous results and impact in the world.

This brings us to the hallmark quote of the book which says...

"Every man has a vocation to be someone: but he must understand clearly that in order to fulfill this vocation, he can only be one person: himself."

God in his infinite wisdom created man with different roles to play on earth, and for each he gave the requisite talents to fulfill that unique purpose for which they were created. Remember the parable in the bible about the talents given to the hard working servants and the lazy servant? (Matt 25: 14 - 30 ) yeah...That!

 So how then do we trace this Dharma in our own lives ? ? ?

* By trusting in our gifts * By thinking of the small as large  * By Listening for the call/needs of the times

• Trust in the gift

Can you think of any activity that you have a seemingly unquenching interest in, which when you engage in with high concentrated effort becomes almost effortless and even enjoyable, time passes by without you noticing, you just flow when doing it, you leap out of bed in the morning to face it, your eyes are shining and your energy is vibrant/infectious when you're engaged in it, people compliment you on it, you feel most like yourself when at it, you're a natural in that area and it feels right up your alley. (Pls take a few minutes to ponder these questions)

Any themes popping up? there could be several but some will spread through all others.

Mine is something like this, I love to read, I could read 24 hrs. straight and not even feel hungry, I read all sorts, and I love to learn and take in new information, not only that...I take lots of notes about what I learn, but guess what...the best part of all that reading and learning is when I have to dish out what I took in, I turn pro or so I've been told, and I have such a good time while doing it. Which leaves me thinking is my dharma to teach? Even as a kid, I was usually selected for teacher roles in plays, I was in the debating club and news club, I was in the dramatic and music club as well (my other interests) but I wasn't a star there, my star shone brighter in the literary clubs, and my friends in Uni. even nick named me principal.

So perhaps I should be a teacher right? well...yes I could be a "teacher", but do opportunities to teach/coach/speak only come up when you bear the title "teacher", the answer is no...because you see, the gift is not the purpose itself, it is only a guide pointing towards it, and a tool to be used in accomplishing it.

However you need to recognise what those gifts are, what those things you are passionate about & great at are, cultivate them by engaging in them regularly in order to sharpen them, because your gifts my friend have a bigger role to play, for which you need to be prepared.

When you neglect those gifts and not engage them regularly, you will notice how your internal energy/enthusiasm levels slowly decline, or that you need to keep inducing your energy levels with lots of other things which do not permanently give the satisfaction you crave, e.g. drinking, partying, shopping, hanging out etc... Not that those things are bad, but when you have to keep doing them in order to boost your energy levels??? I'm sure you get the idea. There are lots of other great examples in the book to provide more clarity.

• Think of the small as large

"Be resolutely and faithfully what you are , Be humbly what you aspire to be"

This quote tells us to be who we are now! not tomorrow, not next year, not when you become famous, or when you make that paper. All the tall dreams you have of who and what you'd like to be, don't wait! Be them, now!

Okay...great, but how? I want to be HR director of a global multinational, and one day own my own leadership academy, how the heck do I do that now! I still have several steps on the career ladder to get to that point and goodness knows the investments and resources I'll need before starting up my leadership academy.

I'm sure we all have different versions of the above  e.g. I just gave ,so lets be real here and quit dreaming right? uhmm, actually, why not?

This book says its because of something called "Grandiosity"

One of the biggest problems that has halted so many dreams is that of "Grandiosity", we have all these big dreams of what we want to achieve and become, but the intention/reason behind why we want to be those things is what stops us from acting now.

For e.g. I want to be HR director, so...what does a HR director do?  and what stops me from doing that now with the small team of people I currently support? Could it be that I just want the title and the pay so people can look at me and say ohh look, she's a HR director and earns so much. Maybe I currently have the basic skills needed to be a HR director but my excuse is that the size of my team is not quite director scope, so im focusing on the title & size instead of the activities which that role actually does, when I could in essence be channeling HR director in my current role and see it as practice for where im headed. Are we getting the picture?

We currently have our little sphere where we can embody these "true" aspirations, and nothing stops us from anchoring the activities around us with the mindset of whatever titles we truly aspire to be, not for the sake of the title, but for the sake of genuinely "doing" what is required of that title.

Once you do this, you will find that you get better with time, plus the authenticity and passion with which you do these activities will cause people to pay attention. The bible says, a mans gift maketh way for him and places him in the presence of kings, but that man would have needed to start from somewhere before the king heard of him right? Again, the problem seems to be our urge to stand before the king without the credibility it takes to get there.

So start using your gifts now, embody your dreams and aspirations, live it now with those around you and wherever you find yourself, believe that the small steps you make everyday will eventually take you to the king. But be certain that you are doing all of this in an area that you love and are passionate about, else you will be unable to sustain it, and those in that area who are right where there should be, will always have an edge over you because they are internally wired to be great at it. Besides people can always tell the difference between what's genuine and what's a forced effort. So as we popularly say "Just do you"...now! always, and keep working at it. The attached picture shows a commitment I borrowed from the book after reading this particular chapter on "Think of the small as large" I find that when I write things down and check back regularly, I commit more intensely to them.(Im such a lists' girl) You can try one for yourself and have it close by for inspiration on low energy days.

• Listen for the call/needs of the times

" The gift cannot reach maturity until it is used in the service of a greater good" . 

Your gift transforms to purpose only when it meets the needs of the times. It might be serving only 1 individual, but trust that the ripple effects from that one individual will set off a chain of reactions that will spread out across the world.

Remember the story of our distressed warrior, it was his offering of his warrior skill set  during that very crucial war between the forces of good and evil that transformed his gift into world changing purpose. He used his gift in service to the call of the times which in this case was a war, and by so doing stabilized the balance of the world.

Now that's a bit far fetched but we get the message right? This guy had fought several wars before (deliberate practice), but there was no record of them, what if he at that point decided this warrior life is too tedious for me, and said you know what, I'll sit this one out. I think I want to go be a priest in the temple, where I can live my life in peace, and have people come offer gifts to me and sing sweet songs of worship, what a great life that would be. Well...besides lacking the obvious traits of a priest which would have made him a horrible priest or mediocre at his best...I bet while in the temple he would have heard of the war and had sleepless nights about the outcome, and if the war was lost, probably commit suicide out of guilt(okay calm down Akpana), or spend the rest of his life sick and miserable, thinking if only I had remained the great warrior I was, the battle would have been won.

How many of us have had conversations like that with ourselves? If only I had made that step, If only I had chosen that path,  if only I had raised my hand, or conversations like... just look at that, I can do better, I know better, if I were the one doing so and so..everything will be different. Well guess what, the world needs you to step up and offer yourself (your real self, your true nature, your essential traits )in service to the various needs of humanity(and these needs abound, so pick your niche). Play your part!

If you bring forth what is within you, it will save you, you will do great things, you will succeed, stories will be told of your good works, you will achieve! you will! But if you do not bring forth what is within you, it will eat you up inside, and eventually destroy not only you but everyone else who could have been saved or helped with your gift! What then will you say, when you are asked what you did with your talents? Definitely not: I did not know that was my talent, or I preferred another talent even though I didn't particularly know what to do with it, or (here's a good one) my family and friends did not quite like it ...and so it got lost, such that even when the times called for your gifts, it was hidden in a pile somewhere and failed to come to light. Missed opportunities & wasted time??? yeah, That!

In summary of the 1st Pillar: The world needs something you know you have (dig deep for it), you should offer it in response to the call of the times! Don't wait till you're "somebody", think of it as practice and offer it now in service to all around you!

I hope this was useful, Cheers to open minds!

Next post will cover The 2nd Pillar